Hi there listeners and welcome to the premier of my (Simon) blogs. In future blogs, you can read on the goings on in the crazy world of Adventure Men.
Being my first ever blog writing experience I must admit that this is all a bit strange. I can only liken this to standing in a vast expansive field perhaps and speaking to myself, whispering even, hoping that a few insects might take interest at first and start to buzz around me, followed by some friendly non-disease carrying rodents and then maybe a herd of cattle amble up towards me and stare in that way that only cattle can.
This laboured metaphor continues in a similar vein to a point where the local village all arrive to hear me speak in this field, perhaps bring a picnic and hang on my every word. I don’t expect this to be the case. Whats more likely is that an angry, over-worked and under-paid dairy farmer hurls a tirade of non-sensical, undecipherable verbal abuse at me, sets his two rabid dogs onto me and then feeds me to his children. Or worse, Jeremy Clarkson decides to indulge his deluded belief that he can drive his car anywhere he likes and he ploughs into me in a Range Rover whilst listening to Phil Collins and eating a Peperami. The very thought of which chills me to the bones, so much so that I need a lie down.
However, I will soldier on in true Adventure Man fashion and to hell with the consequences! Keep it Adventure, keep it Men, keep it Adventure Men.